Triumph the Insult Comic Dog roasts Beto O'Rourke, Ted Cruz

Hear Me Out Beto O'Rourke Is Going to Win Texas

Triumph Insult Comic Dog: Ted Cruz So Racist He Got 9 AM Hour of ‘Today’

Given that Conan O'Brien's TBS show "Conan" is on hiatus, Colbert explains at the start of the segment above, O'Brien was happy to loan one of his correspondents, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, to Colbert.

And unlike his coverage of the 2016 election, this time Triumph got face time with both candidates.

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert sent the only political correspondent courageous enough to ask the tough questions down to Texas to cover the toss-up Senate race between incumbent GOP sweaty narc Ted Cruz against Democratic challenger and The Clash fan Beto O'Rourke. He offers to coach some Latinx voters in the O'Rourke crowd on how to pass as white so they won't have a problem voting. I thought you would have more important things to do two days before an election - like sucking up to the guy who called your wife ugly and accused your dad of murder. After some playful back-and-forth ribbing, Triumph turned his attention to Beto's opponent.

Triumph even talked to O'Rourke himself, joking "does it concern you that half your fans think they can vote via Instagram?" This is merely the bark; the bite is reserved for Ted Cruz.

Then Triumph made his way over to the Ted Cruz rally, or a "Duck Dynasty cosplay convention".

"What do you have that Ted Cruz doesn't have?" I have a preexisting condition that makes me vomit out of my eyes whenever I look at you.

"Which do you think was harder for Ted to forgive?"

But Triumph seemed ready for the remark and hit Cruz with one parting shot. He is, however, likely too liberal to win in Texas, as he supports Medicare for All, supports banning AR-15 rifles, and wants to impeach President Donald Trump. "See, because he's a reptile".

"I'm not saying Ted Cruz supports racist policies, but he was just given the 9 AM hour of Today show", Triumph snarked.

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